


The Willow

by LadyGinoza



Category: Psycho-Pass
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-30
Updated: 2015-08-30
Packaged: 2018-04-18 03:25:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,629
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4690388
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LadyGinoza/pseuds/LadyGinoza
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>I don't want to give a summary cause I'm a lazy ass :3</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Willow

“We’ll see each other again, that I promise…”

A spoken promise of an eight year old, not really knowing anything about the world or about life in general. Back then it had sounded so simple, I was convinced back then that if you’d make a promise then it would surely happen without effort. I was naïve… No… I was just being a kid, an innocent kid who was always a bit too optimistic for my own good but what can you do when you were raised by two loving parents that always sheltered you from the dark world?

Twenty years ago I had made that promise to another boy the same age as I was at the time. We had met during summer vacation when my parents took me to the family cottage to spend the last two weeks of July there. To be honest I didn’t want to go that summer so I ended up spending the first few days beside the river, right under a large willow tree just so I didn’t have to do anything with them.

On the third day the rest of those two weeks changed when I went up to my usual spot just to find it had been occupied by another kid.

After all those times I had went up to the cottage, it had been the first time I’d ever seen another kid there. It was one of the main reasons why I didn’t want to go, there was nothing to do or anyone I could play with and all I wanted to do that summer was to play video games at home so seeing someone else, my age even was a little exciting.

His name was Nobuchika Ginoza and the strange thing about it, it’s been twenty years and I’ve never been able to forget about that kid. He was a little shorter than me, thin and frail with raven hair making his skin seem paler but the feature that always stroke me the most was his green eyes. His black hair and pale skin only helped to make his eyes even more noticeable and it just captivated me. It’s crazy and even to this day I don’t even know why. I’ve seen a few people with green eyes but none of them ever caught my eye, none of them were ever able to captivate me as much as his did.

Just thinking about that one kid that I saw so long ago to the point that it’s pretty pointless always brings a smile to my face and it doesn’t even make any sense. All I know about Gino was his name and that he was the same age as me. I don’t know where he’s from, never saw his parents nor do I know if he has any siblings. I know absolutely nothing and yet I can’t shake the memories away and forget about him.

At the end of those two weeks, we parted ways and I made that careless promise that we would meet again and the year after, I went back to the cottage for summer vacation so eager to see this kid again and when I got there, I went up to the willow tree and I waited but he never came. The year after was the same and the year after that and yet I was never able to forget that one single person.

The thing is that I was never good at making friends, I could never stand having anyone near me for too long but for some unknown reason it felt like I knew him for so long, he was just different. We connected immediately and every day we would meet at the same place and that’s how our summer vacation had been.

I was never able to forget about that time, never could forget about that kid who managed to somehow calm the rage I had deep within me and that might be what saved me from myself… I don’t know anything about him; all I know was that after his sadness had gone away, he had the most beautiful smile I had ever seen.

So many years have passed since then, so many things that I thought was so complicated now seems just so simple compared to the things that plague me now. Most of those plagues are all related to work, to the adult life that I thought would be easy and simple but just keeps getting more and more complicated and harder with each turn.

Even though the blood has long been washed off my hands it still feels like it’s still there. A mistake that I made, it was only a fraction of seconds and the next thing I knew I had my partner in my arms bleeding in the streets. He died before the paramedics could get to us, he died in my arms as blood kept pouring out of him and by the time help had arrived I sat in a pool of blood with my lifeless partner in my arms, his eyes open… His life cut so short. Life is just so fragile.

I wanted to hunt down the one responsible for taking my partner and friend’s life but instead the Chief thought it be better if I’d go on a vacation to clear my head. Although having some time off is probably what I need, but it feels more like a forced suspension only that I’m being paid for doing nothing and now here I am. At the old family cottage, the very place I had hated so much when I was a kid. The place my parents would drag me out to every year until I turned sixteen. We never came back afterwards, life had caught up and time just seemed to disappear.

I have to admit, the old cottage hasn’t changed from the last time I saw it other than some wear and tear from years of harsh weather but it still looks in great shape. However, it feels strange coming back here. The first time in so many years but every time I would come up here it was with my parents. It’s the first time I’ve come back alone and it just feels so strange to think that I spent so many days of my summer vacations here when I was a kid and now I’m closer to the age my parents were back then.

I walk up the wooden steps onto the balcony; unlock the door to reveal all the old furniture still there exactly how mom had left them before we had left the last time we were here. Only the dust serves as a reminder that no one has been here in ages and the smell that says that the windows haven’t been opened in so long but other than that it feels familiar and I guess that’s what I need right now. No cars bolting down the road or any other city noise, just plain calmness.

Before I can even try to relax I’ll have to clean the place up, not like I wasn’t expecting that from the beginning anyway. Mom always took the first day to clean and freshen up the place every summer. I never did try to help her; I was so selfish back then. Always thinking about myself and never about others… I should have helped her more, should have involved myself more in my family. In the end family is all there is, friends can never fill in for what family can.

I turn around and go back outside, closing the door behind me as I quickly scan the view. Nothing has changed and yet the atmosphere just feels different somehow but I keep walking towards the river, following its wide road, leading to the old willow tree that has grown more than I had imagined it would. It’s still there right next to the river’s curve, untouched, undamaged but nothing else.

Every summer after meeting Gino, I would come up here. Hoping that he’d be there but all that welcomed me was the old willow tree with its leaves dancing in the wind. I never saw him again and it bothers me…

I only saw him for two weeks but those two weeks were enough to have his face stuck in the back of my mind and every now and again I would wonder where he’s at and what he’s doing. I don’t even know why I keep thinking about this one kid, a kid that I only know of his name and I can’t help but wonder if he also thinks of me like I do. If my face is also photographed in his memory or if he has completely forgotten about me, long gone in the back of his mind to no importance…

I don’t know why I’m so fixated on him. I don’t even know why I felt a bit of disappointment in my gut to see no one here just now, no one sitting on the stump next to the willow tree. Why I want to see him so badly, I don’t know. I just don’t know.

After being pestered constantly by Sasayama, I told him about my summer with Gino that I could never forget. About how I felt and how nothing makes sense but I almost regretted telling him that afterwards. Instead of taking me seriously I was presented with his constant teasing. Calling it my childhood crush and would tease me about it every free seconds that he had.

I didn’t let it bother me though, I knew Sasayama meant well. He was just that type of guy who barely took anything seriously but he meant well. Sometimes though I wonder if that’s what it really is. Did I somehow form a crush for an eight year old kid back then and that crush never left me and instead it just lingered and is just hoping to be able to bloom into something more but can’t and it’s just making my subconscious mind go crazy?

Twenty years have passed since then, a lot of things have changed and at this point I’m probably the only one still thinking about this one kid. A kid that I don’t even know if hr’s still alive or not and by all means it would only be logical that he would have forgotten about me and moved on. We were just kids…

**XXX**

* * *

 

**XXX**

Cleaning the cottage from A to Z took longer than I had first thought, maybe because I just hate having to clean but I’m not a slob either. I can’t sleep in something that is filthy, I wasn’t raised that way and it had to be done and now it is and I’ll be able to sleep soundly tonight knowing that I’m not lying in filth.

The night sky tonight is clear and the stars shine brightly, the moon is almost full but none the less it shines the brightest. Just sitting on the balcony, watching the fireflies roam around, blinking here and there and listening to the howls hoot in the distance and the frogs croaking somewhere near the river. All of this is just soothing compared to the city life; to think when I was a kid I hated this kind of tranquility. It’s either that I now appreciate the simple things in life or that I’m starting to get old.

Many things change after you fall into adulthood. Things that had seem so unnecessary at the time; you come to realize just how important they really are. Things you took for granted come hitting you right in the face when you lose them. The thing is that you never expect to lose them and that’s what makes it worse. It had never crossed my mind that one day I’d ever lose my parents that they would die so quickly like they did. That I would get a dispatch to an accident and I would come upon my parents’ bodies on site. It hit hard, it hit harder than I ever would have imagined.

It was only after they were gone that I realized just how much I actually depended on them, that it was only once they were gone that I realized just how much that they actually did for me and once they were no longer there that everything I had ever taken for granted came crashing down on me. All the things that I needed to do myself, it became so overwhelming.

**XXX**

* * *

 

**XXX**

I don’t know what to do with myself. I’ve been so busy and stressed out from work for so long that now being in a calm and quiet environment it’s like my mind doesn’t know what to do anymore. I’ve spent a few hours sitting next to the willow tree, reading a book but after a while even reading became dull. You can only read a book just so much until the words just doesn’t want to sink into your brain anymore.

Today just like the other days, the sun is shining and it feels like it will be another hot one which is nice but somehow a rainy day seems to be something I would enjoy. A light rain, in doors with the windows open a little letting the scent of summer rain invade the cottage would be a change of pace but when it rains, it also doesn’t want to stop so right now I’m content with what I have. Nothing beats sunshine when you’re on vacation.

Two days ago I had decided to prepare dad’s famous pulled pork; it was a tradition when coming up here. He’d let the pork soak in a brine solution for over thirty hours and then he’d cover it in dry rub. Wrap it up good in foil and let it cook slowly for twelve hours on charcoal. The scent always made my mouth water; it was the best part of coming up here.

We were never in a hurry; everyone seemed to just have more time. It only seems fitting to carry on the tradition but it strange not being able to share it with anyone, even as it slowly cooks the scent isn’t the same as dad’s. It probably won’t taste the same either…

Morning soon passed and then came the afternoon that I didn’t see go by as the scent of pork and spices cooking became stronger and it was all I could smell. That was my queue to add the corn cobs covered in butter, wrapped in foil, placing them carefully right next to the wrapped pork and then let it cook and all that was left to do was wait another hour.

While that cooks slowly, I wander around. Finding myself walking up the shore of the river towards the old willow tree, it’s like something keeps pulling me back there. I can’t understand it, the place itself isn’t special. All you can see is the river, the old willow tree and the mountains in the distance but nothing more and yet I can’t help but go up there every day. It’s like something keeps calling me to go up there and here I am. The old willow tree coming closer into view, the wind making its leaves dance and the rattling of the branches perfectly mixes with the sound of flowing water and then I suddenly stopped my pace.

A dark haired man is just sitting on the tree stump next to the old willow tree. He seems to be lost in thoughts staring into the distance or maybe he just didn’t hear me walk up from behind.

For some reason I feel as if I have butterflies in my stomach, it’s crazy I shouldn’t but I do. I haven’t seen his face or heard his voice and yet I know who he is. I know it’s him, it’s hard to explain but I just know.

“Hey…” I muttered catching his attention as he jumps a little to his feet in surprise. So he hadn’t heard me coming from behind, I almost feel bad for scaring him a bit but now that I’ve see his face I’m even more positive that it’s him, it’s Gino.

He hasn’t changed, well not really. Other than having matured, his features are exactly the same but they are more defined and somehow beautiful even. His green eyes stand out even more than before, his raven hair is however a bit longer as they hang a little over his eyes but his build is just the same. He looks frail and somewhat delicate, slender even but he’s grown, he might even be a bit taller than I am now and to think that he was much shorter.

“You haven’t changed.” I state, managing to take a few steps forward and yeah he’s definitely taller than I am now.

A light smile forms on his limps and like before, his smile is still the most beautiful smile I’ve ever seen and I can’t believe it that right now, after all these years here he is right in front of me and I can’t help but feel like a total idiot.

“I’d say the same but you’ve changed.” He replied back before sitting on the ground, his back against the old willow tree.

He’s not exactly wrong, I’m not the same person I was back when we last met at eight years old, and even now I’m different from the person that I was at eighteen. My job and then the loss of both my parents is enough to change anyone.

“Twenty years changes a man…” I say before sitting down next to him as I add, the words just slipping out after a few minutes of awkward silence. “I never thought I’d ever see you again.”

Gino doesn’t seem surprised by what I blurted out of nowhere. Actually I can’t tell what he’s thinking right now or how he’s feeling. His smile hasn’t changed, it’s still the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen but something is different now. He’s quieter than I remember and somehow a bit more distant.

“I didn’t mean-”

“You were the last person I thought I’d find up here.” He cuts me off, his tone low and yet soft as he turns to look at me and adds, “But I’m glad you’re here.”

I smile. Hearing that he’s glad to see me was worth more than anything, I can’t explain why he has that effect on me it’s so crazy and yet I don’t mind.

“I’ve got some food cooking back at the cottage, way too much for myself.” I blurt out as I get up on my feet. “Care to join me?” I add as I extend my hand to him and much to my joy he takes it and I pull him to his feet.

We didn’t say anything as we walk down back to the cottage; somehow we didn’t have to because we knew. We knew what had brought us back up here, to the place where none of us wished to be when we were eight and yet it was the place we choose to clear out our heads. Almost like this place just lured us back together and somehow everything that seemed complicated and messed up just cleared up in an instant and that somehow everything is going to be okay now.

**XXX**

* * *

 

**XXX**

The meal I had prepared sure didn’t taste like how dad used to make it but it was good and somehow it didn’t matter. All that did matter was that Gino was here right in front of me and we talked and caught up on the years that we missed. We shared the heartaches we’ve encountered over the years and it was like we had never been apart. I knew him well, as the night grew and I could read him better and I could tell that Gino felt the same way. There was always a connection between us, way back when we were kids and strangely it never went away.

After hearing what happened after we parted ways. How Gino’s life turned upside down when his father died on the line of duty, how his mother couldn’t cope with the loss of her husband and sickness sinked in and he had to watch her slowly succumb to her illness until she died. It can’t have been easy but although he was faced with such grief and turmoils he wasn’t alone. He had his grandparents to pick him up and guide him onto the right path and he did.

When he was a kid he had a dream to follow his father’s footsteps and join the law enforcement just like I did but after his father’s death he changed his mind and for a long time he didn’t know what he should do and it wasn’t after his mother’s death that he found his answer. His hobby and stress reliever was his answer and he chose to work with his grandmother in her flower shop and took over after she died and somehow it just fits him. I wouldn’t want to see him do the work that I do. It’s hard and cruel, he doesn’t need to see the horrors this job brings.

I never did believe in fate or destiny, always thought it was a bunch of bullshit but something definitely brought us back here. Back to the place we met, on the third day. Gino sitting on the tree stump next to the old willow tree, call it whatever it may be. I don’t care; all I care about is that he’s here and I’m not going to let go anymore…


End file.
